22: Succour

Camela ------ It has been said that it's easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than it is for a rich man to enter the Kingdom of God. And as this has been uttered through the lips of history, be they those of Jesus of Nazareth, the apostles Matthew, Mark and Luke, or the 19th century Presbyterian missionary, Bartholomew Plug [/James Shepherd], the intended meaning has remained relatively consistent: that the personal accumulation of material, earthly wealth is such an obstruction to the soul’s salvation, th at a camel, an actual working camel with its hump or humps, some 2 meters tall, may sooner stroll unimpeded through the tiny aperture of a dressmaker's needle than a human soul, burdened with a life of riches, be granted passage through the gates of heaven.  But it has also been said, most significantly by the reformer theologian John Calvin, that in the scripture, the Greek κάμηλος [camílos] - camel - is in fact a corruption of κάμιλος [camilos] - cable or rope, (with the Iota erroneously substituting the Ita) -- a distortion suffered upon the text by some undiscerning scrivener’s hand somewhere down the line. Further to this, the minuscule difference between the two words does not exist in the originally spoken Aramaic, where a single word, גמלא [gmlʔ] means both ‘camel’ and ‘cable’; ropes of the time being largely woven from camel hair. Thus as Calvin, and his Presbyterian followers would have it, the teaching here is rather that it is easier for a fairly fat rope to pass through the eye of a needle than it is for a rich man to enter the Kingdom of God: a somewhat more palatable scenario for those Christians of means, especially if the needle in question is not so much a dressmaker’s, as a sailmaker’s or carpet needle. (A further theory has been propounded, chiefly among sycophantic ecclesiastical attachés of the wealthy, that the ‘eye’ of the needle in question actually refers to a passage in the walled city of Jerusalem known as ‘Needle Gate’ on account of its narrowness: Merchants would have to unburden their camels to pass through into the city, a temporary inconvenience, but one that was certainly possible, and indeed, necessary.) Camels first appeared in North America some 45 million years ago and, while not that small, they were far smaller than their present-day descendants: around the size of a large rabbit. Some would migrate southwards, eventually evolving into alpacas and llamas. But around 5 million years ago, having grown to a height of three meters, a separate strand managed to stroll unimpeded through the strait of Bering - the narrow prehistoric Land Bridge connecting North America to East Siberia - through Asia, eventually migrating as far as South Africa. The dromedary, single hump camel was first domesticated in East Africa around 1000 BC. As a member of the Presbetarian Church of Scotland, James Shepherd tended to follow Calvin’s more rationalist interpretation. However, during his missionary work in the tribal areas of Rajasthan, he was moved to side with the more literal - or fantastical - reading that has camel as camel. After all the Raika herders were a common sight in the region, as they grazed their dromedaries on the low-lying pastures. And whenever he gave sermons on this passage of the camel and the needle, it seemed to bring great succour to the spirits of the poor and dispossessed tribespeople, who were so denigrated and excluded by the propertied Hindu castes, that this punitive narrative alone would often send them into the arms of God. And so the mission’s numbers grew, its congregation swelled, it built schools and dug wells and Shepherd’s reputation as a moderniser and philanthropist sent shockwaves throughout the region. But, in 1889 he was found stabbed to death, having suffered a single blow to the heart with a sharp instrument to this day never found. The red blood cells of a camel are uniquely oval in shape, so - as it thickens in the heat - their blood can continue flowing through even the narrowest vessels. Soupy ----- Everything turned into soup. We agreed between us that we would drink it through straws and try to make amends by having it all in one sitting. But we became full remarkably quickly and we were left still up to our waists in the stuff, so we began frantically collecting it in our hands, pockets, anything we had on us and then traipsing through where previously there had been a gate, the path, and our house. Mother was standing in the vicinity of where there had been the front door and you could tell she was vexed by her tightly folded arms and furrowed brow. When she clocked us, she beckoned for us to come quickly, “Move it, move it you two!” she said in a chocked, shouty whisper. Old habits do die hard so, though there was clearly nothing else from us to the horizon in all directions, except for the soup below and sky above, she still carefully scanned around to see if any of the neighbours were watching as she would have done before. With no door for her to slam behind us or any house to speak of to shield her interrogation, she told us to sink down into the soup which came up and in to our mouths and garbled our rather hopeless explanations.